Unconventional Life – Podcast, Blog, Live Events

Category: Wellness

Ep. 171 – 4 Ways to Become Comfortable with Taking Imperfect Action, with Hilary Jastram

There have definitely been moments that I have scrolled through a social media platform and had an overwhelming emotion of not feeling good enough. Recently, I have noticed a difference in the content that is being published. This new content is leaving me feeling inspired rather than questioning my worth.

There are a few key influencers that are highlighting their imperfections rather than posting a version of themselves that is polished and perfect. Their popularity is skyrocketing and they are getting more views the ever, but why? The raw, reactive and unplanned content is desirable because it is more relatable.

It’s 2019, people are craving more. We want to see your story of how failures actually led to your success, the number of attempts and ferocity it took to arrive where you are at today. We are so over a photo showing a photoshopped body and the view from your villa. We want to be taught something new, to see your humanness and vulnerability.

I know it may not be easy to share this vulnerable part of yourself with the world, but I can guarantee that the authentic version of you has value and should be shared with the world.

This week on the Unconventional Life Podcast is Hilary L. Jastram. Hilary shares her journey and insight around imperfect action. She gives us 4 techniques that can be used to expand our comfort zone and ditch the certainty and perfectionism that hold us back.

Hilary is the founder of Sick Biz, “An organization dedicated to providing support, resources, hacks, and hope to entrepreneurs affected by chronic illness, pain, disability, and sickness.” She is also the founder of J. Hill Marketing & Creative Services, an agency specializing in premier copywriting and book editing for Fortune 500 brands and the “one-percent,” superstar entrepreneurs. She is an author, editor at The Good Men Project, and contributor to Influencive, The Huffington Post and The Mighty, among other large-scale publications.

1.The law of motion

According to Newton’s Law of Motion, an object in motion will stay in motion. This directly applies to taking action. Inspiration is not a prerequisite to start, but rather something that will naturally occur once you start spinning your wheels. Inspiration flourishes through action, so stop overthinking and just start sharing your ideas with the world!

You are your worst critic and Hilary says that “the only person creating labels and boxes around you is yourself.” Someone who never buys a paint set because they “aren’t a painter” will never become one. Every “master” has once been a beginner. It always takes the first bold step to set yourself in motion towards your destiny. “We all have the same gifts, it’s just a matter of who is practicing them.”

So lets get painting!

2. We are never done learning and the best way to solidify what we have learned is to teach someone else.

The world is constantly turning, and the pace of change and development is accelerating exponentially. “ Learning is a huge goal that we can never let go of because the minute we say we are done learning we become very presumptuous”

The most noticeable area of advancement in our society is undoubtedly in the realm of technology. We now carry a connection to the world and an infinite supply of information in the palm of our hands at all times of the day, so why not use it to our advantage?

From what you’ve learned, share your experience, opinion, and voice, without a filter. You don’t need to be a professional to get your message across, nor have a professional set-up. Your phone is your link to the world and making a drastic impact. Feel empowered to use it as a tool to spread your message!

For example, someone could be inspired by your advocacy for the planet and join your #noplastic challenge only because they saw you talking about it in your feed. Even if you are not a big influencer with 100k followers, there is still a massive impact and butterfly effect created from you doing you!

“ we are multifaceted diamonds, all of us, and we get to be “experts” in different things in our lives”

3. There’s no such thing as a block, only self judgment.

When Hilary encounters some type of blockage or can’t express idea she interprets this as “sign from the universe to go inward, be calm and listen” This is a great reminder that you don’t have to be hustling at every moment in order to be successful. Listening and reflection are a part of the progression that leads to success. “You may think you are stuck, but you are right where you are meant to be. When you get up and running again you are more prepared for the next step.”

We all get creatively stuck at times, navigating our way through this maze is a part of the process. Another key to finding your way out of this maze is your mindset. It is unlikely that good ideas are going to come flooding to you when you’re telling yourself that you are not good enough. How you treat yourself when you are feeling frustrated will determine the overall outcome. If you allow yourself to be freely, authentically you, the emotions will pass and naturally new waves of inspiration will come. Give it time, sometimes it takes patience.

4. Build an environment where you are allowed to mess up.

Hillary reminds us that humans are addicted to certainty and perfection. This limits us from evolving into the unknown since we are pre-programmed to want to know the outcome and to avoid mistakes. This reduces our ability to take risks, creative leaps or to try on something out of character. “Throughout your process, remember, you are allowed to mess up.” Forgiveness for your “mistakes” should become an automatic response. You know when you have done your absolute best, so get in touch with that honest part of your being that forgives” yourself for being messy and imperfectly perfect.

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April 22, 2019
Ep.169 How to Rise Up to Every Moment, With Yogi, Chelsey Korus
Chelsey Korus is a trailblazer and is a highly regarded yoga teacher and philosopher. She has been teaching yoga since the age of 15 and has been an avid life long learner in numerous movement practices, including Anusara, Power Vinyasa, Ashtanga, Acro, as well as martial arts, free form dance, and ballet. Along with an exceptional depth of practice, Chelsey is a triple major with degrees in Dance, Theater, and Vocal Performance.

A decade of learning and teaching around the world has led her to design, AWAKE, a “total package lifestyle” around SOUL ☀︎ SPIRIT ☀︎ ENVIRONMENT.

“The concept of AWAKE is a driving force in my life… I don’t want to live another second asleep. These are the practices I’ve designed to help people awaken to their moment, and have the tools to step into their wholeness.”

The soul is the deep dive into who you really are, into your soul gifts and what you can share with the world.  This connection to yourself can be cultivated in numerous ways but for Chelsey, the deepest is through a Traditional Yoga and Meditation practice. “When you commit to arriving on the mat, every single day, and observing what is within there is a profound shift that emerges from your being.” From this zoomed out perspective and witnessing your noticing, you gain new insights and ideas and are guided to your best next steps. It’s important to remember that this knowledge doesn’t come from an outside source, this inner knowing comes from your soul and everyone has access to this intuition.

“ There is a river that is always rushing with creativity and generative ideas, we get removed and forget that it’s there and we need to get into the cold water to be refreshed and remember what is within.”

Another way that you can tune into this rhythm of inner knowing is through a journaling practice called Morning Pages – write three freeflow pages, first thing when you wake up. This uncensored way of journaling quiets the mind and allows your subconscious to come through. When you really let go and stop judging what comes out, you will be amazed how many insights will appear on your page.

Spirit is your connection to something bigger than yourself and a sense that you belong to something bigger Eg. Acro Yoga, groups or socials. A community is a place that we can receive acknowledgment, and reflection from our peers. We need people around us that say “Hey, I see you, do you know where you have been and where you are now?! You’re doing an amazing job” this feedback encourages us to keep going and shines a brighter light on our gifts because the truth is that our worst critic is usually ourselves.

“We all have this really cool spot to fill in the web of life that is our own but this web is interconnected.”

You might be wondering how to get involved in a community, where do you start? Write down 3 or 4 areas of interest, then search for events or groups on Facebook or Meet Up’s that match your interests. If you can’t find anything that resonates I encourage you to start the community or group up yourself! Guaranteed that other people share similar interests as you.

The part that you can change and control is your Environment. Everything in your life is an accumulation of the choices you make and the people you surround yourself with. It’s up to you to set healthy boundaries, make choices that support your growth and find mentors that inspire and encourage you to rise up.

Chelsey is a big nature lover and hosts beach and river clean up’s at many of the festivals she teaches at. She has also created the earth challenge #awakeafearthchallenge, which supports plastic-free living and caring for the Ocean.

“We affect each other- our thoughts, words, and actions really matter, we are creating a future for other generations.”

These three pillars are the framework for AWAKE but sometimes life doesn’t flow exactly as planned or in our desired direction.

We asked Chelsey how she keeps positive and grounded when life serves a crap cupcake or when the shitake hits the pan…
- Be in nature, be mesmerized by her beauty and resilience, because you too have those same qualities.
- Take your time to experience grief. See grief as a teacher, welcome grief in to provide you with clarity so you can know and trust your definite “yes” and “no”.
- Be courageous and step out into the wild night and the unknown.
- You don’t have to go through anything alone, surround yourself with a community or someone that can hold space for you and listen.
- Have compassion for yourself. See and hear the voices that are speaking- the future self that protects, the teenager that is rebellious, the small 6-year-old self that is fearful, hear all these voices speaking and witness them. The more you have this relationship to yourself from a compassionate place you can say “ I know where that’s coming from but that thought is too small for me, I’m not subscribing to that idea anymore. I’m going to go bigger, I’m going to play bigger.”
- It’s only hard right now and it’s going to get easier cus life doesn’t get easier, you get stronger.
Chelsey’s knowledge and perspective on life are truly beautiful. No matter if you are experiencing grief or already walking the path, she shares insightful tips on how you can continue to refine and rise up to your greatest self.

If you would like to meet Chelsey and experience her infectious joy you can join one of her adventures here! She is teaching at the Wanderlust 108 events and has some spectacular retreats coming up in Greece, Wyoming, and Bali. For a daily dose of inspiration, you can follow her on Instagram.

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April 8, 2019
How to Utilize Your Eroticism to Fuel Your Creative Genius with World Renown Sexologist, Jaiya

It’s widely believed that intimacy must stay behind closed doors, but what if your eroticism is actually fuel that has the ability to awaken latent creative genius in your brain! According to Napoleon Hill’s classic Think and Grow Rich, when channeled effectively your sexuality has unimaginable superpowers. In fact, after a 90-day orgasm challenge, Jaiya tripled her income by using her pleasure as her purpose.

Once a shy little girl, Jaiya grew up in a poor, abusive environment and remembers spending countless hours hiding away in her Catholic school library. She’d dive into books about eroticism and sexuality, frantically learning as much as she could about the ways humans intimately interacted with each other. It’s clear to acknowledge the budding sexologist she already was at such a young age. From eradicating the idea of storks delivering babies amongst her peers to designing a masterful system that helps anyone discover their erotic type, Jaiya made it her mission to uncover and debunk the mysticism around eroticism.

Right before listening to Jaiya’s episode I took the quiz and found out I’m a Kinky Type (Find out what you are here). Initially sharing this feels vulnerable and exposing, but after sitting with what she shared in the podcast, I’m choosing to try on a new option which is to feel permission to be exactly as I am. In a world where sex is primarily a culturally taboo topic, Jaiya is an advocate for releasing shame and uncertainty by providing tools that empower people to embrace this sensational gift we were all given at birth. Sex is a fundamental aspect to life and yet time and time again, Jaiya saw how many of her clients would express dissatisfaction and shame about their needs or desires.

How frequently do you feel shame or misunderstood about your sexual preferences? Does talking about eroticism bring anything up for you? Understanding the drive of your body is a constant learning process, and Jaiya’s work came much from her own trials and tribulations. Part of her service to humanity is helping clients speak, heal and expand the possibilities of pleasure to experience turn on in all realms of their lives.

Jaiya believes that sexual incompatibility is a myth and that each type has its own language. Take the Erotic Blueprint quiz and see what your type is. Learn how to articulate your desires and needs. Share with your partner and learn their type too. Notice your behavioral patterns and thoughts about your sexuality. Find mentors, therapists, and support systems to assist your exploration. Be a student of sexuality and together we can carve a new awareness and greater self-acceptance.

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Amelia Broughton is a relational facilitator, writer, and purveyor of connection, pioneering a more connected, communication-savvy, and emotionally intelligent planet. She facilitates Authentic Relating and Relational Leadership in various settings and communities. Her expertise is in team dynamics and interpersonal relations. With over 10 years of experience on teams and in communities, Amelia’s vision for the world is one of beautiful interconnection, a place where we put down the distractions and to-do lists to bask in the miracles that surround us. The type of connection that nourishes us internally, externally and has every one of us feel seen, heard and loved with a true sense of belonging. An active Unconventional Life member, Amelia consistently contributes her writing.

February 12, 2019
How to Live an Unstoppable Life with 11-Year-Old Fashion Designer, Hanalei Swan

Do you remember being asked as a kid, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Some of you might remember that question and laugh, wondering where the younger version of you got those fun ideas. Or perhaps, you’re more like Hanalei, and you chose to take action as fast as you could on said future dreams.

At the ripe age of 7 years old, Hanalei was asked: “what do you want to be now?” Her response to this question redirected her future someday self into taking immediate action. She’d been traveling around the world with her parents since the age of 1 and had always loved art and drawing. Through a serendipitous meeting at a restaurant in Bali, Hanalei and her parents would meet a fashion designer who would be instantly taken by Hanalei and her fashion sketches.

It was in this moment that Hanalei would declare herself as a fashion designer, ultimately stepping into her greater mission to change the world through slow fashion.

The Power of Your Mission. The more I listened to Hanalei share her story, the deeper I felt the magnitude of her belief in herself and her mission. This little lady is devoted to all that is important to her. The fashion industry is the 2nd largest contributor of waste on our planet, and Hanalei is doing everything she can to reverse these side effects through consciously chosen products and sustainable manufacturing practices. For every item purchased, she also gives a school uniform to kids in India, ensuring they can go to school to get the education they need to continue positively impacting a world that needs them.

What can others count on you for? What are you doing to have a greater impact in your industry? What shift could immediately shake up the status quo for positive change? Where are you giving more instead of consuming? Notice where your mission could be of benefit and apply your contribution to the health of our planet.

Action Over Uncertainty. Hanalei is a firm believer that there is always an immediate action you can take to make your dreams your reality. When I met her in Bali, I was immediately struck by her “let’s do this” attitude. She is ready and willing to do whatever it takes to execute and show up, shining brightly. Her brilliance is seen in how she is choosing to impact millions of people through empowering and inspiring them to dream bigger and challenge everything that societal conditioning has told them to push away or shut down.

Whatever may be inhibiting you from taking action on your dreams, let Hanalei’s words address the programming that has potentially distracted you from diving into the depths of your potential. Don’t let conventional wisdom imprison you. Discover your own internal wisdom and give yourself permission to pave the path that is uniquely yours.

The world is waiting to see what your limited edition dreams are.

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Amelia Broughton is a relational facilitator and purveyor of connection, pioneering a more connected, communication-savvy, and emotionally intelligent planet. She facilitates Authentic Relating and Relational Leadership in various settings and communities. Her expertise is in team dynamics and interpersonal relations. With over 10 years of experience on teams and in communities, Amelia’s vision for the world is one of beautiful interconnection, a place where we put down the distractions and to-do lists to bask in the miracles that surround us. The type of connection that nourishes us internally, externally and has every one of us feel seen, heard and loved with a true sense of belonging. An active Unconventional Life member, Amelia is our Operations Director and consistently contributes her writing.

December 31, 2018
How to Make Your Wellness Routine Work for You and Your Business with Ines Festini
There is no one-size-fits-all work out, diet, routine, or nutritional guideline, especially when you’re constantly on the go. The most important thing you can do for your health and wellness is to find what works for you. Many people think that taking care of themselves is a complicated and overwhelming task, but Ines emphasizes that it doesn’t have to be this way. She suggests starting with simple, basic steps that can be done in less than one hour a week depending on what you wish to achieve.

If you only have a few minutes before that morning meeting, what could you do to feel more grounded and powerful before the day gets away from you? Do you have a favorite beverage to kick start your day? What is your favorite way to move your body? Could you prioritize 10 minutes of your most joyful movement? Start simple and work your way up to more complexity.

For some inspiration, here is Ines’ morning routine:
- Meditation every day
- Some form of movement, even if it’s a few minutes
- Dry brushing for detoxification purposes
- Lots of water and green juice or powder
- Bulletproof coffee
- Journaling for 10-20 minutes
Make Yourself a Priority. Ines is a firm believer of only doing what you love. After years of unhealthy habits and drilling herself into the ground, Ines lost her sense of self completely until she finally figured out what needed to shift. She’d made her career and everyone else the priority forgetting about herself in the process. She recalls barely recognizing herself as she looked in the mirror one day. She couldn’t feel her body, was living for the weekend and had been numbing herself just to get by.

Ines shares her story so that others don’t have to go to such extremes to find their best self and health. She believes in making your routines excite you and committing to making your wellness routine non-negotiable.

What is it that you’re committed to? Is it your happiness? Your mindset? Your fitness? Know that success starts with you. Imagine the way you want to look. Remember how good you feel after a good exercise? What is it that you desire when it comes to your health and wellbeing? She shares, “as soon as you feel that your workout is another task and its work, it’s the wrong approach.”

Permission to Do What Feels Good. Some days your body may want a good sweat, on others, you’ll simply want an easeful walk. Perhaps you enjoy meditation or maybe you prefer to write or take a detoxifying bath. Give yourself permission to find what works best for you. For instance, if a morning routine doesn’t fit in, try evenings.

Remember what you’re committed to and find your own flow. What time of the day do you feel most energized? What is your favorite way to unwind? When can commit to scheduling yourself in every day? At the core of whatever you do, make sure you’re doing something you love and be consistent.

To kickstart your routine for 2019, download her Successful Self-Care Planner here!

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Amelia Broughton is a relational facilitator and purveyor of connection, pioneering a more connected, communication-savvy, and emotionally intelligent planet. She facilitates Authentic Relating and Relational Leadership in various settings and communities. Her expertise is in team dynamics and interpersonal relations. With over 10 years of experience on teams and in communities, Amelia’s vision for the world is one of beautiful interconnection, a place where we put down the distractions and to-do lists to bask in the miracles that surround us. The type of connection that nourishes us internally, externally and has every one of us feel seen, heard and loved with a true sense of belonging. An active Unconventional Life member, Amelia is our Operations Director and consistently contributes her writing.
December 27, 2018