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Category: Wellness

Millennials, Say Goodbye To Feeling Stuck: 3 Tips To Overcome Setbacks

Abruptly, you feel stopped in the middle of your career path. The way ahead appears hazy and uncertain, with no clear opening in sight. You’re not sure what to do or where to go, so you stay put where you are — but your resources are running out.

Perhaps you’re struggling to make a difficult decision, your finances are getting tight, you lack motivation, or you’re afraid of failure and making a big mistake.

No matter the reason, the experience is the same — you feel stuck. And it can be incredibly challenging to muster the strength, confidence, and clarity to move forward.

If there’s one man who knows this particularly well, it’s Steve Martel. He’s a real estate wealth expert who influences more than 100,000 entrepreneurs annually and has helped investors acquire over $350 million worth of real estate in the past three years alone. He also knows what it’s like to feel stuck and lose $47 million overnight, yet he hasn’t let it stop him.

I spoke with Martel about his uncanny ability to get “unstuck” and keep moving forward on this week’s podcast episode, “How To Get Unstuck: The Secret To Overcoming Million Dollar Setbacks w/ Real Estate Mogul Steve Martel.”

Martel’s drive stems from the battle with cancer he began waging at age 16. Doctors told him he had a 90% chance the cancer would persist, so he decided to start living like he was dying.

“I had no choice, because I had built in my mind that I only had 5 more years to live,” Martel says.

Instead of going to college, Martel began selling homes. At age 18, he sold 78 homes, while the average real estate agent sells 4 to 6.

At age 21, he sold 250 homes and earned $4 million.

From there, his trajectory only went up and up, but not without plenty of setbacks. Anyone who plays a big game knows it involves big risks.

Martel’s gotten stuck more times than he can count. He’s declared bankruptcy, lost millions on deals, and even had business partners screw him out of contracts. Yet he is where he is today because of his commitment to persistence.

“I counted, as an actual positive blessing, that I did go through cancer, because today I am living the most awesome life ever with my children, with my friends, with my business that I can’t even count as work,” Martel says.

Below, Martel shares the secrets that have helped him get out of sticky situations and proceed to generate personal success.

Live like there’s no tomorrow. If you believed your time was quickly dwindling, you wouldn’t wait to get started on doing the things you love, or creating the life you dream about. You wouldn’t make excuses for why you aren’t ready yet, or why you can’t get back in the game. You would possess the unparalleled drive of a dying man. You may not actually have a deadly disease, but you can choose to operate from this mindset to ignite the burner beneath your actions and hold yourself accountable to moving forward.

Burn the bridges behind you. When you’re stuck in a rut, it can be tempting to backtrack and cling onto what feels safe. But this massively hinders your progress and keeps you in a state of fear. To ensure you avoid doing this, make it impossible for yourself to turn around. “The science behind momentum is burning the bridges behind you, share your passion and story with other people,” Martel says. “That now obligates you and commits you to actually moving on forward. You’ve got no other choice but to succeed and that’s how you have to see it in your head.”

Be willing to take risks. The number one reason Martel became successful was because he didn’t shy away from taking risks. He dealt with enormous sums of money, reasoning that the only difference was “an extra zero.” Play a bigger game, and you will reap bigger rewards. When you can’t decide on your next move, take a risk and see what happens — if you happen to make a mistake, you will only learn from it and become wiser.

This article was originally published on Forbes

February 28, 2018
4 Steps To Make Peace With Your Inner Critic And Get Out Of Your Own Way

We’ve all got one — and it can seem like it will never leave us alone. Just when you’re about to launch that new product, or give that important presentation, or interview for that job you really want, it comes knocking at your door.

I’m talking about your inner critic. That voice inside your head that nags at you, tells you you can’t do it, and reminds you of all the times you’ve failed.

Meet Joel Brown, a guy who’s appeared on magazine covers and TV shows, worked with Tony Robbins, and spread the knowledge of self development all over the world. He’s the founder of Addicted2Success, a motivation site with an audience of over 80 million viewers.

He’s just like you — except he’s made peace with his inner critic. He’s a testament to the kind of success that’s possible when you finally get out of your own way.

“We are all designed in a certain way and born into this world for a purpose. A lot of us really just get in our own way all the time,” Brown says.

If you’re looking for all the details, on how Brown got his start just four years ago check out this week’s podcast episode, “Making Peace With Your Inner Critic w/ Addicted2Success Founder Joel Brown”

Brown dropped out of high school in 11th grade, and never attended college. If anyone’s got reasons why they can’t make it big, it’s him.

Yet he hasn’t let any of that stop him. He says the secret to his success has been having the courage to look at his limiting beliefs and heal them.

“My body doesn’t just hold organs and blood, there’s also an emotional body,” Brown says. “Once you understand that you can start clearing away things and your true calling comes through.”

Brown’s true calling has emerged in the form of his blog and podcast and producing the movie RiseUP, which has inspired millions to look inward and overcome their mental blocks.

Below, Brown shares his top 4 steps to create a mental framework that cuts through the excuses and empowers you.

Step #1: Bring curiosity to your negative beliefs. Naturally as human beings we are skeptical. Approach your negative beliefs objectively — get curious about why they are there. Don’t identify with them or make yourself wrong for them, but rather see them as a natural response to your life experiences and allow them to be there. Perhaps you’ve struggled to make the money you want, so you’ve developed the belief that making money is hard and unlikely.

By bringing curiosity instead of resistance or judgement there is space for those beliefs to have a voice and ultimately begin to complete and disappear.

Step #2: Feed your positive beliefs. “Turn the noise down on negativity and turn the noise up on empowering beliefs,” Brown says. Tune into the thoughts that encourage you and give them more attention — what you focus on grows. If you’ve got a belief that you’re charismatic and great at making friends, reinforce that for yourself. Take it a step further by imagining yourself networking with people who uplift you. You’ll open up this avenue for yourself in real life by truly believing it’s possible.

Step #3: Be committed to mastery. Be willing to become a master at whatever is important to you- overcoming a limiting belief, creating a breakthrough in your business, or initiating a daily routine. When you live your life with the framework of mastery you have the opportunity to sit in the student chair and prioritize your own learning and growth over anything else.

Each day focus on a 1% shift- it could be waking up with gratitude, taking a short walk, reading a chapter in a book, making an important phone call, or saying yes to something that feels out of your comfort zone. Before you know it day after day you will begin hacking away at anything that stands in your way.

Step #4: Create a 10-year vision gameplay. Envision what you’d like your ideal life to look like in 10 years. Dream big — don’t underestimate what you can accomplish in a decade! Start with the 10th year, defining every aspect of your life from personal relationships, to business, finances, health, recreation and travel. Then, write down everything you would need to have done in the 9th year to get there, in as much detail as you can. Break it down for yourself month by month if you can. Repeat by going backwards in time each year until you get to the present moment. Commit to this vision and to actually taking the steps you’ve listed to get there — it is possible.

5 years ago, Brown went through this process, and today, he’s already living his 10 year vision and then some.

This article was originally published on Forbes

February 28, 2018
One Millennial’s Open Conversation About Body Image As An Actress Turned Health Coach

In today’s world, we face a tremendous amount of pressure to conform to body standards. We are constantly bombarded with messages to ‘lose 10 pounds fast’ or ‘get in shape for bikini season.’ The implication of these messages is that we are not skinny enough, not in shape enough, and not sexy enough, as we are.

It can be challenging to navigate these ideals while honoring yourself and your unique body. No matter what your body looks like, you have probably experienced some form of self-scrutiny or questioned if you have the “right” body. You simply can’t avoid the matter in a body-conscious world.

Unfortunately, the body image conversation is often a silent one, between a woman and herself. It is generally considered taboo to voice the concerns you might have about your body and your relationship to food, especially as a woman entrepreneur or in a highly competitive workplace when you are being evaluated constantly.

Until now, that is.

One millennial is stepping up and giving a voice to the silent struggle billions of women know so well. She had a particularly rough journey with her body as a former TV actress–but now, she’s a women’s health coach and the youngest author at publisher Hay House, with her book, The Goddess Revolution, launching in June.

Meet Mel Wells, creator of The Green Goddess Life, who I spoke with on this week’s podcast episode, “The Anti- Diet: How To End The War On Your Body w/ Hay House’s Youngest Author Mel Wells.”

At age 18, Wells began her acting career and found herself immersed in a competitive environment that led her to make tough decisions. “When you’re in a world where you and your body is the difference between you getting the job and you not getting the job, you put immense amounts of pressure on yourself,” says Wells.

For her, this meant going on crash diets and, ultimately, developing body issues as she tried to stay employable. One time, her producer met with her to discuss her body size. Wells reflects, “I was completely overwhelmed and turned to using food to control elements or numb feelings.”

It took witnessing her dad get cancer to finally wake up to the reality of the damage she was doing to her body. Watching her dad fight for his health, Wells says she was confronted with the potential consequences for abusing her own body and resolved to become a health coach.

Through working with clients, she was able to heal herself and put together a method that works to resolve body issues, encourage healthy eating, and restore body freedom.

The Goddess Revolution seeks to take over as the new ‘anti-diet’ by sparking a new way of thinking that will help women end the war on their own bodies. By attacking modern issues like ‘fitspiration’ and the obsession with perfection caused by celebrity glorification and magazine airbrushing, Wells hopes to break the cycle of negative talk that keeps women from feeling fulfilled and fully self-expressed.

For any woman, it is important to learn to honor yourself by honoring the relationship you have with your body first. When you have that strong foundation established you can more easily stand up for yourself in the workplace and say ‘no’ to objectification and discrimination in your career based on your looks.

Relieving the pressure of body image starts by loving yourself. When you love yourself by loving what you are creating in the world, you can overcome any adversity.

At age 26, Wells has certainly made waves and evolved into her true self despite challenges. Consider these three powerful lessons for navigating your own path.

Lesson #1: Just go for it, even if you don’t feel completely ready yet. Wells says the best advice she ever got was to “start before you’re ready.” That means to summon the confidence to take action even if you don’t have everything figured out. Everyone makes mistakes, but they tend to be the best reflections for improvement.

Lesson #2: Use your personal story to your advantage. The lessons you have learned along your own journey are the best source for credibility and experience. People will connect to your story and want to work with you because they know you’ve been where they are and have overcome it. Don’t be afraid to share any mistakes you’ve made as they can actually testify to how far you’ve come and show people there’s hope no matter where you are.

Lesson #3: Don’t let your age stop you. When you’re young, it’s easy to perceive age to be a limiting factor to your success. Wells can empathize: “when anyone starts business in the coaching world it can be daunting to assume anyone wants your advice,” she says. But the notion that you’re not old enough to achieve what you want is simply false. Don’t apologize for your age; let your experience and results speak for how qualified you are. You never know, your young age may become your biggest asset someday.

This article was originally published on Forbes

February 28, 2018
How One Cofounder Launched AcroYoga And Why She Walked Away From Her Global Success
“The moment where you accidentally start a global movement at 1 a.m. in a San Francisco loft.” That’s what you’ll hear when Jenny Sauer-Klein tells you how she cofounded AcroYoga back in 2003.

Jenny met her cofounder Jason Nemer, an elite gymnast with an extensive background in circus training, at a party and instantly bonded over their shared passion of movement. She was only 25 and at the time, and taught yoga and circus arts at after-school programs in Oakland, CA. Less than a month later, the pair launched AcroYoga.

AcroYoga is a dynamic practice that fuses acrobatics with yoga and healing arts. It involves carefully synchronized movements between partners and cultivates trust, connection and playfulness. Practitioners span across six continents, totalling in the millions worldwide.

(I recently interviewed Jenny for my podcast, Unconventional Life. Listen to Jenny’s podcast episode here.):

When you ask Jenny about the beginning of AcroYoga, she’ll tell you that she never expected it to turn into a global movement and business. The first few years weren’t easy. As Jenny shares,“It wasn’t an intellectual discovery. It was a very active, in the world, making money as we went discovery of exploring what this thing is.”

And, she didn’t go all in at first. She kept side jobs and maintained steady cash flow until she was mentally ready. For her, it was a process to see, feel, and believe that a movement was possible and that she had to be the one to usher it into the world.

Flash forward to 2012.
The risk paid off. From the outside it seemed like Jenny had made it. AcroYoga had spread to several continents, hundreds of teachers had been certified in the practice, and practitioners were numbering in the hundreds of thousands. But from the inside perspective, Jenny wasn’t happy.

She found herself tired of the lifestyle, constant travel, and the work it took to catalyze communities around the world and then coming home only to feel really alone. She would wonder, “Where are the people who aren’t my students? Who are just my friends?” She then realized she wanted more. She wanted to build a life with someone and to get the essence of AcroYoga (“trust, connection, playfulness”) out to a different group of people, like those in companies and organizations.

When Jenny realized she wasn’t 100% committed to her business, like she had been before, she knew in order for AcroYoga to stay healthy and the community and the company to thrive, she had to walk away.

To let go of her role and status, her identity that was wrapped into everything she had built, proved to be the hardest decision she’s had to make. And in the process of selling her half of the business to her co-founder, she learned to trust she could leverage all the connections, life experiences, and what she had discovered over the last 10 years into something new.

What she realized was, “To see something through a complete life cycle—from ideation, to birth, to growth, to sustaining, and then to let it go… is incredibly powerful and empowering as a businessperson. I feel like I have so much more to offer, and it’s given me immense freedom in terms of not being identified with the form that is coming through me.”

Jenny has shown that belief to be true over and over again in her latest work, Play on Purpose, which helps new teams to accelerate creativity and collaboration through playful games and exercises. This initiative lets her provide strategic learning and development to companies and organizations, in playful, embodied engaging ways, proving that training doesn’t have to be dry and boring to be truly effective.

Jenny’s story is instructive for millennials who worry that their early success may box them in for the future. The takeaways?
1. If you can do it once, you can do it again. As an entrepreneur, you get to make it up as you go along.
2. Don’t be attached to the form of expression that is coming through you. Finding “your thing” requires experimentation, tweaking and tuning the dial, playing with the knobs of happiness, and not being afraid to make adjustments, even if that means letting go. Sometimes that sweet spot will last for 10 years or sometimes it will be a few months before it is time to adjust again.
3. Your creations never dies, it just transmutes and transforms into the next thing. You never lose the life experience that you gained from trying something, or the connections you make, all of that stays with you and you leverage that into the next, and the next, and the next project. Just go for it
4. Trust your own creative well, it will never run dry. Find the balance between offering and listening. Putting something out and not only paying attention to how it is received but also how you feel in the doing of it. You will feel it when it is right, trust in that feeling and let it guide you in your decision making.
If you want to win a free copy of Jenny’s course “Rock Your Workshop” ($500 value) that takes you through the process of designing interactive events in 7 days listen to the podcast for details. Then enter to win here. Jenny has made this offer exclusively to Unconventional Life readers and listeners.
This article originally appeared on Forbes.com.
February 28, 2018
Millennials, Here’s Why You Are Addicted To Self-Improvement
Resources:

The Self-Help Addict: Turn An Overdose of Information Into a Life of Transformation

Giveaway:

Enter Daniel’s giveaway to win a signed copy of his book, The Self Help Addict! To enter, submit your name and email at www.unconventionallifeshow.com/giveaway and write us a review on iTunes. Winner will be selected 2/5.

3 Key Points:
1. Self-improvement can provide an excuse for inaction.
2. The key to initiating action in your life is to break the cycle of consumerism and passivity.
3. Many of us are controlled by our thoughts; Daniel shares how instead we can control our thoughts by relating to them differently.
Article:

You’d be hard pressed to find a millennial who isn’t involved with self-improvement in some way.

According to one survey, 94% of millennials reported making personal improvement commitments and said they’d be willing to spend nearly $300 a month on self-improvement.

I myself first got into personal development over ten years ago when I attended the Landmark Forum, a learning program that offers seminars around the world. I’ve since invested tens of thousands of dollars in my own development, eager to enroll in transformative courses and attend live events… and don’t even get me started about my daily reading habit.

On the surface, self-improvement seems like a great idea—it promises to help you “transcend your limitations” and “unlock your potential” as a human being.

But when we delve just a bit deeper, self-improvement has a shadow side.

One millennial author claims self-improvement has an “addictive” nature that keeps us in a state of consumerism, all the while providing an excuse for inaction.

“When you get to that last page, suddenly there’s a sickly feeling inside. While you’re reading a self help book you’re telling yourself you’re being productive. The problem is when you finish, you’ve got to take responsibility, and instead you just go onto the next book and the cycle continues,” he says.

Meet, Daniel Gefen, author of The Self Help Addict: Turn An Overdose of Information Into a Life of Transformation. He’s an entrepreneur who has founded and scaled multiple companies and currently hosts the top rated podcast, Can I Pick Your Brain? which features guests like Russell Brunson, JP Sears, and Yanik Silver. Gefen was recently named by Influencive one of the Top 25 Most Influencive Influencers of 2017.

This week on the Unconventional Life Podcast, Gefen discusses why self-improvement can be addictive if used incorrectly.

Read on to make sure you’re not falling into any of these self-improvement traps.

Self Improvement Keeps You A Consumer.

While consuming self help resources may seem like a surefire way to fast-track your personal development, Gefen says it’s essential not to fall into the trap of passively consuming these resources and forgetting to actively apply them to your life as they were intended.

“Some millennials are addicted to self improvement because they are allergic to focus,” says relationship coach Jamie Thompson. “ That might be a sobering gut check but fact is with so much ‘pop self-help’ available the human tendency is to reach for quick fix after quick fix hoping something will do it for you.”

While self help “overconsumption” can certainly defeat its purpose, there’s no need to throw the baby out with the bathwater. If you’re somebody who loves personal development resources, why not just commit to actioning what you learn in the real world? Tony Robbins’ podcast tells us “burst” exercises like striking up a conversation with a stranger can be actually be quite effective.

It Teaches You To Value Thought As Much As (And If Not More Than) Action.

In the self help world, you’ll often be told that a solid measurement of the progress you’re making is the quality of the thoughts and feelings you’re having. You may have heard you should “think positive thoughts” or repeat a mantra to yourself in times of distress. While this may seem like good advice, it can also be limiting. Mindfulness app Headspace teaches us that this line of thinking can quickly lead us to “police” our thoughts and become too rigid in our pursuit of eliminating negative thoughts.

Instead, Gefen reminds us the objective isn’t to attain “thought purity,” but in fact it may be more helpful to detach from our thoughts altogether. “Our thoughts and feelings control us instead of the other way around,” he says.

Choose to give your thoughts less power by allowing them to recede in the background of your awareness rather than being your focal point.

It Inhibits Action.

“At the realm of thought you say to yourself I’m going to lose this much weight, I’m going to make this much money. But then another thought comes in and says no you’re not you’re going to fail—and now you have a battle,” Gefen says.

Getting too caught up in your mental chatter can inhibit you from taking action. That’s why psychologists recommend a skill called “opposite action,” which takes you out of the realm of thought and into the realm of action by initiating the opposite behavior of your thoughts. For example, if you’re feeling apprehensive about bringing something to your boss, using this skill you’d rise to the occasion and have that tricky conversation anyways. “The main purpose is to reduce your need to avoid,” says Alice Boyes, PhD, author of The Anxiety Toolkit.

It’s not about engaging with your thoughts—and arguing with them—but rather, about grounding in action to settle the matter once and for all.

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January 31, 2018