Unconventional Life – Podcast, Blog, Live Events

Category: Relationships

  • EP:176 Engineering Human Connection: How “Being in the Now” Addresses the Loneliness Epidemic with Seth Bunting

    EP:176 Engineering Human Connection: How “Being in the Now” Addresses the Loneliness Epidemic with Seth Bunting

    Your morning train ride is packed wall-to-wall with a sea of people swaying to and fro, the white glow of phone screens illuminate faces as they madly swipe, click and text. The train is silent.

    In a fast-paced world of constantly packed schedules and instant communication, authentic and meaningful human connection is hard to come by.

    Enter Seth Bunting. Seth has made a life of creating outside-the-box, immersive atmospheres, and events that are conducive to connection. Using human loneliness as a roadmap, experiential designer and scalable live experience curator, Seth Bunting, walks us through the realities he creates where carefully designed physical spaces and experiences draw event participants out of their phones and into the present moment.

    “People are seeking to come back into connection with each other and they don’t know how. We believe it’s possible to begin redesigning social spaces, physical and digital environments, the places we are interfacing with every day…how do we redesign all of that so that we have more connection with each other?”

    We are living amidst the largest loneliness epidemic mankind has ever seen. Our current society values hyper-individualization and rewards self-reliance. From pop culture action figure icons touting the “I’ve got this”, solo warrior mentality capable of saving the world on their own to the self-help movement, guiding people towards the notion that all answers lie within themselves, a world where people need each other is not the story of the hour. The result– a lonely generation glued to their phones for a sense of belonging and connection. 

    A nationwide survey of 20, 000 adults found that 54% of respondents said they feel “no one actually knows them well”, while 40% stated that their “relationships aren’t meaningful” and they feel “isolated from others”

    Through his projects Presence and Equilibrium, Seth Bunting makes actionable change towards addressing what he sees as the two core concerns that inhibit meaningful human connection.

    • Human Connection
    • Presence

    “Everything that we are creating for is just to drive people to states of being. The states that we hope to achieve are just to bring connection to each other.”

    Seth creates alternate worlds for his experience attendees. The goal: to invite authenticity, play, vulnerability and an essence of magic into the mix. Using a technique called the deictic shift (the phenomena that occurs when you become consumed by the emotional journey of your beloved Grey’s Anatomy characters) he designs experiences where people become the lead character of their own story, interact with the world around them and connect with one another.

    How to cultivate presence daily

    Designate a time in your day to be tech-free

    Set that timer for one hour, maybe even two or three and give yourself a well-deserved reprieve from the constant stimulation of your phone. If you walk and text, which most of us do,  it’s near impossible to be present with your surroundings, the people walking past you and the stunning bloom of spring around you. Unplug, unwind and look up!

    Improvisational theatre (I know it can be scary…I dare you!)

    Improv is the embodiment of the moment, off the cuff and unscripted exploration created completely spontaneously. We spend so much of our lives in our logical, thinking mind and activities like improv get you out of your head and into your body.

    Eat a meal with no distractions! No book. No Music. No Phone.

    Take this time in your day, the time you’ve set aside to nourish your body as a time to connect with yourself, your food and take a well-deserved break. Building a positive connection with your food means also being present with it while you’re eating it. Ever heard the phrase you are what you eat? The mindstate you are in when you eat influences how your body interacts with your food! You are far less likely to overeat and far more likely to enjoy your meal when you give it your undivided attention. 

    Meditation

    Introducing a regular meditation practice into your life offers a multitude of benefits from reductions in stress and anxiety to a more focused mind, less prone to distraction. If you’re a beginner and need some direction, consider signing up for a class at your local yoga studio.

    Movement/Exercise in nature

    Sweating and increasing your heart rate daily is the key to overall health and vitality. The combination of movement and being outdoors adds an extra level of nourishment to your practice.

    Connect with your senses

    Removing your shoes and getting your toes in the sand, grass or mud (oh I went there!) connects you with our beautiful earth. Close your eyes. Now: what does the ground below your feet feel like? Can you feel wind or moisture in the air? What does the air smell like? Turn your focus to your 5 senses and ask yourself to identify something you are detecting using with each – eyes closed!

    Weekly Giveaway! One free ticket to the Equilibrium Event!

    The Palace of Fine Arts, Sept 13-15th in San Fransisco

    *Really interested? Send us an email and let us know why!

    Written by Olenka Toroshenko

  • EP:175 Three Ways To Cope With Grief To Live Courageously, With Kirsten Schowalter

    EP:175 Three Ways To Cope With Grief To Live Courageously, With Kirsten Schowalter

    In today’s world, you might feel that you are constantly fed with ways to level up and be brave.

    This advancement is engrained in our society and living up to this level of advancement could feel like you are carrying around the weight of expectations.

    What if I told you that the key to reaching these higher, more advanced levels was actually to revisit all the situations where you felt pain? Only when we take the time to be with our pain and properly grieve can we rise up to something greater.

    This week on the unconventional Life show is Kirsten Schowalter. Kirsten is the Author of “In My Own Skin” and founder of Ageing Courageously, a community that inspires people to make dreams come true at every age and The Flip Side of Life, support and resources for a new way to grieve. Kirsten fills us with insight and knowledge about a topic that is so misunderstood and often so silent.

    “If you want to see a rainbow you have to learn to see the rain.”

    ― Paulo Coelho, Aleph

    Embrace Your Growth Cycles

    We all go through change, we lose a job, have a shift in identity, we feel dissatisfied, our weight fluctuates, we have money struggles or we find a new romantic partner.

    If you observe nature and the cycle of a tree, you see that in each season it grows, blossoms, shed its leaves and hibernates. When the leaves drop they decompose to provide nutrients that support the continued growth of the tree.

    You are hardwired to mimic nature.

    You too have cycles where you go into hibernation, shed layers and usually, need a period of rest and reflection before you are ready for your next big move.  You probably don’t view the tree as dying just because it sheds a few leaves but just a natural process of growing.

    Once you are able to get acquainted with these cycles in all aspects of life, the more resilient you become.   By not getting knocked down by figurative death you learn to release what is no longer present and for you and this can be an awakening experience to a fuller life.

    Don’t Be Afraid Of Your Feelings

    Are you ever hard on yourself for slowing down? Or try to hide sadness because you think you should be happy? Often it’s not how you feel but how you think about how you feel that shapes your experience.

    For example, If you are feeling sad but say to yourself  “I shouldn’t be sad, be positive, put on a smile” this won’t be an authentic expression and will actually require more effort to pretend.  

    When I feel in a funk I ask myself, “What is the most nourishing thing I can do for myself? It could be watching Netflix for 4 hours, having a bath or letting myself cry. The most important part is to not feel guilty or label emotions as negative experiences. By doing this practice I have found that I have become stronger and much better at navigating any painful experiences in my life.  

    The number #1 question that Kirsten receives from her clients is “how do I talk about my grief or sadness? , what do I say?” Kirsten says, “That peole are afraid to talk about their fears because they think that their sadness or grief could be contagious. In reality, the pain from grief is the footprint of your love.”

    Shortcut The Lows And Accelerate The Highs

    Let’s face it, life is a rollercoaster ride, there are high- highs and low- lows. So how do we find balance and ease throughout this process?

    Kirsten shares that once we get in the habit of navigating our emotions and giving ourselves exactly what we need in each moment we are able to find inner confidence and rise up to something greater.

    Kirsten says that “courage comes from a lot of vulnerability and we can build the strength and skills to live with and dance with vulnerability to become more courageous in our next step”

     

    Giveaway! “How To Cope With Grief Masterclass” – A 9-week program Learn how your grief can lead to your passion and purpose.

    Check out Kirsten’s website and Book

    Access the Free webinar “How to Talk about Grief”

    + A recording of the talk Jules references from the National Life Insurance Conference.

    By: Lisa- Renee Delwo

  • How To Filter The Noise, Stay Focused, Follow Through and Find Fulfillment, With Poet, Yung Pueblo.

    How To Filter The Noise, Stay Focused, Follow Through and Find Fulfillment, With Poet, Yung Pueblo.


    After scrolling through Diego Perez’s Instagram account (@yung_pueblo) I’m struck by how seemingly simple yet profound his words are.  Each swipe past black-and-white content square surprisingly soothed my mind and drew me deeper into my own peace and patience. His story reflects one of activism, self actualization and a fierce commitment to his own path.  This impressive display of wisdom was by no means without trials and tribulations and is a testament of his honesty, courage, and path to healing.

    Insights inspired by Yung Pueblo’s words

    “Sometimes people are simply meant to teach you how to not act in the future” – yung pueblo

    When Perez leaped into the unknown to begin his writing career many people thought he was crazy.  He wasn’t making money, was being supported by his partner, and feeling very insecure about his decision at times.  With very little results, he watched others gain success but kept focused on his meditation practice and writing. He knew he had to write about his discoveries as a meditator and saw how powerful his healing was as an active member of society.  He believes that “you’re a much less harmful person to those around you” when you’re continuously turning inwards.

    People may not understand your intentions at first and they may think you’ve lost your mind, but like Yung Pueblo, it is an act of courage to keep going despite all odds.  When you meet others that are doing the unthinkable or seemingly impossible, lift them up, cheer them on, and see the magic in what is being provided by their journey. In this case, Perez’s dedication to his inner knowing evolved into an immensely successful pursuit.  

    “a hero is one who heals their own wounds and then shows others how to do the same” – yung pueblo

    Born in Ecuador but primarily growing up in Boston, MA, Perez was an avid activist in his community. Over the course of his younger years, he joined groups of young people that were given serious power to design campaigns and learn how to organize and take action around the things that mattered to them.  This supporting of one another’s vision seemingly wove itself into the fiber of Perez’s life and continued into his adult life when he began to meditate at the age of 24. He’d seen how powerful each individual was during these days of activism, but he’d also still felt the misery.  To Perez meditation is a cultivation of internal happiness, which in turn betters society with a positive ripple effect. He began to realize how impactful his meditation practice was and chose writing as a medium to share with others what’s possible.

    With so many different avenues to explore that bring release and relaxation today, it can be challenging to know which techniques to try.  When Perez refers to being a hero, he sees supporting and encouraging one another to be happy, and ultimately more powerful, as a courageous feat.  By finding your own way to healing and sharing with others, you are doing the work that’s so desperately needed in this day and age. In his commitment to sharing this wisdom, I’d say Yung Pueblo truly is a hero himself.  

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    Amelia Broughton is a relational facilitator, writer, and purveyor of connection, pioneering a more connected, communication-savvy, and emotionally intelligent planet. She has facilitated Authentic Relating and Relational Leadership in a 9-month training named T3 (Train the Trainer), in workshops with companies such as Authentic World, Authentic Revolution, and Authentic Relating Training International, around the world in communities such as Unconventional Life and Momentom Collective, and in the past year has facilitated monthly events at Archipelago Clubs in Denver, CO. 

    Amelia’s writing has been featured on mindbodygreen, in Conscious Lifestyle Magazine, Boulder Lifestyle Magazine, and The C3 Method.  An active Unconventional Life member, Amelia consistently contributes her writing.

  • How to Lead with Love and Be A Part of International Women’s Day with Global Sisterhood

    How to Lead with Love and Be A Part of International Women’s Day with Global Sisterhood

    Healing the Divide, Every Step Counts…Here’s How Global Sisterhood is Changing the Narrative:

    In just the past few years, we’ve started to hear the vivid stories of injustice that were once silenced or ignored, the “Me Too” movement has spread like wildfire, and surfacing traumas have initiated women worldwide to speak up and share their painful experiences.  With bottled up emotions and shame finally getting overdue air time, the magnitude of variant orientations has been manifested and expressed at times with immense charge or trigger. And while these terrible acts occurred for many, many years before receiving rightfully deserved attention, the awareness is finally asking the world to take a serious look at how we’ve oriented towards masculinity and femininity, not necessarily just gender, but an overhaul of what we deem as acceptable ways to treat one another as a global society.  

    According to Walsh, it’s not one man or woman’s fault but the fault of many years ago.  A disproportionate valuing of the masculine orientation towards life over a more feminine or balanced perspective that in turn created structures and systems that favor a certain way of living life.  This certain way of living tends to position women in feeling not enough, wrong, or undervalued for who they are and what they can tangibly “bring to the table”. Whether silently resenting, angry, abused, shamed, or any flavor of damage in this global wound between women and men, there is much work to be done however you view the story or situation.

    In Walsh’s case, her pain presented itself in many different ways.  From abusive relationships to a lack of supportive women in her life, she shares,  “I think the hardest part of what I went through wasn’t necessarily the trauma from men or boys which was significant, it was the fact that I didn’t feel like I had women or girls that had my back and that would stand by me or just  knew how to stand by me”. As a young girl, she felt a lot of shame about who she was, didn’t believe in herself, and felt very much alone a lot of the time. She would learn to heal from this downward spiral and change the way she thought about life and her power.  Her path was by no means immediately focused on creating a worldwide movement of women coming together in a circle. In reclaiming her own femininity, she began to see how vital her purpose in changing the narrative was for women. Instead of comparing, judging, and competing with women, she would choose to expose the actions she wasn’t proud of to a hundred woman at the Texas State Capitol when she was invited to speak a peace prayer.  Sharing the shadow of being a woman inspired a man to ask her to continue leading woman, healing their traumas and empowering them into their purpose. Walsh’s vulnerability inspired others to claim their own shadow and choose new actions. She is a shining example of an empowered woman living her mission to help others do the same together.

    With humility and grace, Walsh wants women to know that they are not wrong for the way they feel. By coming together and supporting women globally, Global Sisterhood is a platform to inspire women to lift each other up and be advocates of a more compassionate, understanding world.  

    No act of love is too small.  Whether it’s noticing the negative thoughts you’re having about another woman and shifting your commentary or acknowledging your pain in such a way as to not damage or diminish, but create awareness for new choice and change, there are infinite ways to heal the divide.  There is not necessarily a right or wrong way, but an opportunity to learn how we can better be with our feelings, our emotions, our experiences, and our perspectives. In all honesty, there has never really been a “How to Effectively Be a Human” manual, let alone how to be feminine or masculine.  Sure, there are morals and values that our respective societies tend to celebrate and share, but there is not a one-size-fits-all model that everyone knows how to follow or respond to. To have compassion and be authentically honest with ourselves, is a step in the right direction. We are all in this learning process together.  

    There is something beautiful, something to celebrate, something to shift your perspective in each and every person on this planet.  First, come together, choose compassion, choose to listen, choose love, and choose to learn from the past to make different choices for the future.  

    Join thousands of women on March 8th for International Women’s Day!  

    To learn more go to https://www.globalsisterhood.org/

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    Amelia Broughton is a relational facilitator, writer, and purveyor of connection, pioneering a more connected, communication-savvy, and emotionally intelligent planet. She facilitates Authentic Relating and Relational Leadership in various settings and communities. Her expertise is in team dynamics and interpersonal relations. With over 10 years of experience on teams and in communities, Amelia’s vision for the world is one of beautiful interconnection, a place where we put down the distractions and to-do lists to bask in the miracles that surround us. The type of connection that nourishes us internally, externally and has every one of us feel seen, heard and loved with a true sense of belonging.  An active Unconventional Life member, Amelia consistently contributes her writing.

  • How to Creatively Combine Passion and Purpose for Positive Change with Rising Appalachia’s Chloe Smith

    How to Creatively Combine Passion and Purpose for Positive Change with Rising Appalachia’s Chloe Smith

    Thoughts inspired by some of Chloe’s favorite quotes:

    “You’re Calling is Sometimes Louder than Your Comfort” Being a professional musician was never the initial goal for Chloe Smith.  She grew up in a community of musicians and was one of the few kids running around with a bunch of adults. 

    It didn’t even occur that being a musician was a viable professional career path at the time.  Both her and her sister were raised playing classical piano but weren’t interested in investing in the musical route until after they graduated high school.

    One of Chloe’s favorite quotes is “your calling is sometimes louder than your comfort”, which contributed to her bravery to take the stage time and time again when music did, in fact, seem to be part of the path.  Her quote beautifully represents this aspect of no longer being able to let the discomfort distract you from your purpose.  Chloe shared that she’s made tons of material that has never made it to production and that she is usually her own greatest critic.

    Is there something that’s been calling your name, but also seems wildly uncomfortable?  Sometimes the path isn’t clear until it is, and even then it’s constantly evolving.  Notice the breadcrumbs along the way and keep putting one foot in front of the other.  Whether you’ve already taken the leap into entrepreneurship or you’re on the fence, the unknown and uncomfortable unfortunately deter so many from choosing the path that beckons their name. 

    Don’t let your comfort zone keep you forever.  Check out what’s on the other side.  If you’re anything like Chloe, you’ll combine aspects of your life that you’re deeply passionate about for greater impact and reach. 

    “Don’t do Art for Art’s Sake” Unlike her sister, Leah, Chloe was really uncomfortable on stage and had to make a conscious effort to choose this path.  The sisters had always been very close and were deeply passionate activists.  Using their voices for political purposes was the fuel that helped spark their music career, and ultimately a greater movement.  This quote from their father naturally invoked a deeper meaning to their music.  They set out to spread awareness about the issues that mattered to them and used the music as a platform to reach people in nontraditional ways. 

    The Slow Music Movement and Rise Collective became ways for them to honor the creatives and place attention on the misaligned values of the music industry.  They talk openly about the pitfalls and injustices happening in the music industry.  It’s all about leaving the towns they visit better than there were before arriving, advocating for slowing down and rooting deeply into the culture.  It’s more than just the music for them.  It’s about inspiring people to create the change they wish to see in the world.

    Whether you’re an activist, artist, musician, or all three, the common thread is to inspire a deeper feeling, an action, a thought, something that alters or interrupts what was once there before. Even if you believe you haven’t a creative bone in your body, there is a way to incorporate art into your life or business.  Add artistic elements to your environment, listen to an inspiring talk about something you’re interested in, or invite a friend to join you at a local event.  Get involved with something that matters to you.  Create a life that has a deeper meaning, something more than just the money, something that has the ability to make each day greater than the day before. 

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    Amelia Broughton is a relational facilitator, writer, and purveyor of connection, pioneering a more connected, communication-savvy, and emotionally intelligent planet. She facilitates Authentic Relating and Relational Leadership in various settings and communities. Her expertise is in team dynamics and interpersonal relations. With over 10 years of experience on teams and in communities, Amelia’s vision for the world is one of beautiful interconnection, a place where we put down the distractions and to-do lists to bask in the miracles that surround us. The type of connection that nourishes us internally, externally and has every one of us feel seen, heard and loved with a true sense of belonging.  An active Unconventional Life member, Amelia consistently contributes her writing.